We overthink when our body has a hard time feeling.

This simple but profound truth captures the essence of rumination—the mind spinning stories to avoid the emotions waiting to be felt.

Here are some of the stories I’ve heard many times over the years:

“How did this happen?”

“I felt something was off. Why didn’t I say anything?”

“Is he happy now?”

“Did he really treat me this way?”

“Is he a narcissist?”

“Is this new relationship going to last?”

“When are they going to get their karma?”

Spinning, spinning, spinning...

I’ve been there—the hell-realm of rumination. It’s been over a decade, but I still remember the endless looping stories about my ex. I couldn’t stop thinking about him, and I seized every opportunity to talk about him. Yet no

matter how much I analyzed, dissected the stories, or turned to well-meaning friends for validation, nothing truly landed.

And if it did, the relief was fleeting—gone as quickly as it came. The truth is the thoughts are endless. The ego stories are endless. The obsession with finding the “answers” is endless.

But healing has nothing to do with anything outside of you. Would validation feel good? Yes. But it won’t last long, because the hurt has already been done. This is yet another ego trap—the idea that if they get

theirs, the pain will stop, but it doesn’t work that way.

Healing asks us to make a journey from headspace into the body.

When I listen to a client caught in a story, I ask them to pause and breathe. A few deep belly breaths. Drop your shoulders. Feel your feet on the floor. You’re held. You’re safe.

“What do you notice?” I ask.

Sometimes it’s sadness. Sometimes disappointment. Some are able to connect with the grief, and the tears fall. Some can't connect, so we just sit there and breathe. And for a moment, there’s space.

Even if it’s fleeting, there’s space.

Connecting with the vulnerable feelings underneath the rumination is how we heal. To cry. To sit with the

frustration, the disappointment, the grief. To let it move through us instead of spinning away from it.

This work is not easy. It takes time and guidance. If you’re someone who lives in headspace—like so many of us—shifting into the body is a process. But it’s a process that brings us closer to peace.

A Practice to Break the Cycle of Rumination

If you find yourself caught in obsessive thoughts, here’s a practice to help

you shift:

🌱 Recognize the Thought:

When you catch yourself obsessing, pause. Say out loud or internally, “This is an unhelpful/intrusive thought.” Naming it creates a moment of space between you and the thought.

🌱 Drop Into Your Body:

Take three deep belly breaths. Feel your feet on the floor, your shoulders relax, your body held by the surface beneath you. Allow yourself to come back into the present moment.

🌱 Be Curious:

Ask yourself: “What is this thought protecting me from feeling?” Notice if sadness, grief, or frustration arises. You might want to journal about what comes up—or simply sit with the sensation in your body.

🌱 Rewire with Compassion:

Each time you challenge the thought and allow yourself to feel, you create new neural pathways rooted in safety and clarity. Gently say to yourself: “I’m safe. I can feel this.” Treat yourself with the same compassion you’d offer a dear friend.

🌱 Commit to the Practice:

This process takes time. Like building a muscle, it requires repetition. Even when the thoughts feel louder, trust that each time you pause, breathe, and connect to your body, you’re cultivating resilience and emotional freedom.

Gentle reminder that this work isn't easy, guidance and support is often necessary. If you've spent much of your life in your head, know that shifting into the body is a gentle journey, one that unfolds with patience and

compassion.